Les interprètes, c’est un peu comme les médecins. Chacun a sa spécialisation. Dans la médecine, après avoir complété ses études et s’est vu décerné un diplôme de généraliste, plusieurs se spécialisent comme dermatologue, rhumatologue, cardiologue, gynécologue, etc. Chez les interprètes, après avoir obtenu son diplôme (ou pas, car la profession n’est pas réglementée en France), nombre d’interprètes se spécialisent dans les domaines juridique, économique, technique, médical, etc. La médecine, ce n’est pas mon domaine de prédilection mais cela m’est arrivé de faire quelques conférences dans le secteur médical. C’était surtout pour dépanner des collègues ici et là qui cherchaient désespérément un bon interprète disponible pour la date en question. Lorsque j’accepte de telles missions, c’est sous certaines conditions : avoir de la documentation bien en amont, être accompagné dans la cabine d’un-e collègue bien callé-e sur le sujet et de faire une division de travail me permettant d’interpréter pour des présentations les moins difficiles. Quand je dépanne un-e collègue dans le domaine médical, c’est de bonne grâce, mais sans prétention d’être un as. C’est ainsi que je me suis trouvé dans une cabine d’interprètes à Orsay, au sud de Paris, en mai 2005. Les conditions étaient loin d’être idéales pour moi. Car il ne s’agissait pas de médecins qui dialoguaient avec leurs patients, ni avec le grand public, mais bien avec d’autres médecins. Alors vous pouvez imaginer la technicité des échanges.
Le pire était à venir. Malgré une division minutieuse du travail, à peu près toutes les présentations étaient assez techniques, donc relativement incompréhensibles pour le commun des mortels. C’était un laboratoire de recherche qui organisait la rencontre, en mettant un maximum de spécialistes à la tribune avec, pour chacun, un minimum de temps pour présenter les résultats de leurs recherches ou de leurs expériences cliniques. C’est bien connu, pour être compris de son auditoire, il faut toujours parler clairement, lentement, sans entrer dans des grandes joutes oratoires, tout en utilisant un langage accessible à tous. Mais cette mission était un véritable concours d’égos. Car contrairement à de simples praticiens qui sont proches de leurs patients, chacun de ces professeurs de médecine, chirurgiens de haut niveau, chefs de service et autres profs de fac des écoles réputées avait la certitude d’être la référence internationale par excellence dans son domaine de spécialisation qui s’adressaient à d’autres égos tous aussi prétentieux que les leurs. Alors non seulement un langage hautement technique était de mise, mais en plus le débit de paroles était d’une vitesse fulgurante, le tout dans un domaine que je ne maîtrise pas à 100 %. Alors bonjour les dégâts pour la compréhension !
Aucun des augustes orateurs n’a daigné se présenter dans ses vêtements de travail (blouse blanche de rigueur dans les blocs opératoires et en milieu hospitalier). C’était costume trois pièces comme si chacun était le PDG de Sanofi, d’Aventis, de Servier, de Bayer ou d’autres grands laboratoires pharmaceutiques. Au final, ils étaient tous payés, directement ou indirectement, par l’industrie pharmaceutique pour faire leur présentations marathons. Si je n’avais qu’une fraction de leur rémunération annuelle je serais aujourd’hui un homme riche. Mais peut-être que je le suis déjà, dans un sens. Car comme veut le dicton, la richesse, c’est la santé.
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